Beet Juice and Bullshit

Day 1

So, I learned how much ginger is too much ginger. And sleep is a good response for being hungry…nah, I already knew that, but I was reminded (fun shopping tends to trump food shopping 7 out of 10 times…every time).

This thing I’m having the hardest time with today? Its not the hunger, missing food, or feeling weak. Its the fact that I’m not going to be able to play the MadMen drinking game during the season 5 premiere….But I guess its for the best, I mean the premiere is two hours long, I would probably ended up with alcohol poisoning anyways… 

… I want a whisky on the rocks….

Where this starts…

I bought a juicer today. A crisis purchase, like a boat or a porsche, something compensate for not being where you want to be in life, being old, or having a small dick. But since I’m a 22 year old college student, and a girl, i didn’t need the porsche and I don’t think student loans will cover a yacht. So I got a juicer… and a couple pairs of boat shoes. I got the juicer because I’m unhealthy and unhappy. Long sob story short, I have some health conditions that greatly affect my metabolism and after I stopped being an athlete, my body blew up like the Zeppelin (take that as a blimp or explosion joke, your choice). Combined with the injuries I stopped playing for and a series of not so pleasant events that happened in my family and personal live, I have become a hot mess. And its time to change. I decided to start from the bottom up: happy body, happy mind. Which brings us back to the juicer. I’m going to do a 30 day juice cleanse, to jump start the major diet and life style changes I am going to have to make to get back into fight shape. Having done different cleanses in high school, I know how ridiculous this is going to get and how crazy you get before its over. So i this tumblr is to help motivate me to get through this. But the main point of this is for the absolute entertainment of whoever reads this (if anyone), because shit is about to go down. enjoy.